Sunday, September 5, 2010

Us Magazine Review

Hello and happy Labor Day weekend! In the earlier stages of this blog I said I would do an Us magazine review weekly...obviously that didn't happen. Truth is, many weeks in a row I didn't find anything entertaining/notable enough to write about. I mean, do we really need me to pontificate on the farse that was Levi Johnston and Bristol Palin's engagament? Bachelor engagements have been more genuine (and longer) than that for pity sake. Alas, this week had some notables that I felt like writing about, so here we go...

First of all, I think "Teen Moms" have been featured on the cover three out of the last four weeks. I don't watch this show. While it probably makes for compelling TV (hopefully it gives the whole, not so pretty picture), I don't think these girls should be treated as celebrities and be showing up on magazine covers. Should we really be glamorizing their very difficult life choices? On a lighter note, or should I say emaciated note?

This picture is frightening to me. Worse is the caption ' "I try to do a variety of exercises," a cut Kelly Ripa...tells Us." First of all, those aren't "cuts" of muscle...they're protruding ribs. Her sternum is grotesquely protruding, and her jaw looks hollow. Okay, so the arms and legs look like they have some muscle tone, but all in all...waaaaaay too thin. In light of the popularity of the movie "Kick Ass" I think Kelly Ripa is going for her own movie franchise "Carc-ass." Please eat a sandwich.

Next up we have unfortunate dresses. Jessica Simpson got a full page spread on an ill fitting red dress that admittedly looked just awful. The media calls this poor girl out on everything related to her appearance. I say, "leave her alone," however I will gladly take a shot at Kate Gosselin.

I looked at this and I thought, Didn't she wear? Isn't that from? and after a little research, yep, she wore a costume from Dancing With the Stars to an Emmy party. (sorry the picture is so grainy...had to pull a low resolution one from the internet)

Now, there is no shot in hell they asked this woman to dance (hello, one DWTS judge said she looked like a shopping cart that her partner had to push around, and another said it was "hard to watch."), so let's sum it up with one question...Why? Outside of the dance floor, the only place these costumes are appropriate is a tranny convention. Then again, she had on enough makeup (you could pave a road with the amount of mascara)and the hair looks wiggy enough, so maybe? Now, there's a new reality series for you. Moving on...

Much earlier in the magazine they had a whole spread on Katy Perry and cute little dresses she was wearing. I always thought she had a bit of a Betty Boop thing going on, but when I saw the first dress I had to pat myself on the back for the accuracy of the thought...

Am I off base here? I have no beef with Katy Perry, it was just a notable in my shallow book.

And that's a wrap. Frankly, I like writing about the real life mommy stuff better. Let's see if back to school offers any more material. Enjoy the holiday weekend and I'll talk to you soon!

1 comment: