Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Scenes From a To Do List

Dramatic flashback to last Friday. Kids are off from school and my mom is with us for the holiday weekend. This is my chance to run (I want to write "away" here, but no...) errands child free. I'm in the car and doing Oprah proud by making it a "cell phone free" zone. However, I have it in the cup holder for easy access at red lights. It starts buzzing. The anticipation kills me, is it a girlfriend calling to chat? An emergency at home? I dutifully wait until I can safely check. And the answer would be "D - None of the above." Turns out it's a reminder from my to-do list. It may as well have been a call from Buzz Kill. In an effort to go paperless, I upgraded my phone to an android do-hicky that allowed me to download an app to put the ever present to-do list and calendar on my cell phone. Now it's as if the damn thing has a life of its own, buzzing me to let me know what is "over due." Next thing you know it's going to be like an electric fence giving out shocks when things don't get done. I have a vision of me being zapped all over the tri-state area...it's not pretty. But I am getting ahead of myself, for now it just buzzes. The fact it is on my cell phone prevents me from chucking it out the window.

This is what the to-do list looks like this particular Friday:
1. Wash laundry
2. Fold laundry
3. Put away laundry
4. Mall
- Goggles for kids
- Buy reprints at Picture People
5. Target - Easter treats
- infant toys
- fip flops
- bread
- cards

The whole laundry thing is on the list every day. I HATE laundry. There is zero accomplishment factor. Even if you get the God foresaken task done, by day's end it's already piling up again. They should really add a new cycle. Heavy duty cycle, perma press cycle, and the new vicious cycle just because it is so appropriate. Doing a week's worth of wash for five people could seriously take all day. This is why I have it broken down into wash, fold, and put away. It gives me some shot of being able to cross off something in the laundry arena. The only real purpose of having a to-do list is so you have the satisfaction of crossing things off. You have to give yourself every advantage.

Oddly, after all of that ranting I'm not even doing laundry. I am on my way to the mall and then off to "the mother ship" (that is code for Target)to take care of items 4 and 5. I whip through the sporting goods store and get the goggles in record time. Off to the Picture People. Reprints ordered. I have now fired through two to-do's in ten minutes. I am on fire. While my pictures are printing I feel a magnetic pull to Ann Taylor Loft. I reward my time efficiency with this "off list" stop. Sale racks are looking good. They had cute jeans and a flowy white top that I thought would look good with a jacket I have at home. I recently got through a post pregnancy weight loss plateau and am feeling optimistic. I buy my pre-pregnancy size. I am of the opinion that the world is a scary enough place...no need to go into the dressing room. Fast forward to the "try on." at home. Optimism quickly evaporates to "What was I smoking?" Jeans cause terminal muffin top (I may not die of it, but think I may die WITH it), shirt is way too shear and my jacket is proportioned all wrong for foreseen outfit. I add "Return to Ann Taylor Loft" to the to-do list. This is what happens when you make off list stops. I wonder if the phone can zap me when it senses my doing this.

Off to Target. Again, I whip through my list, but this time fall victim to another shopping vice. Buying in multiples. When flip flops are $2.99 you should buy them in a couple of colors right? This however, is not what gets me in trouble. Infant toys are on clearance. I pick up three and on a last second whim pick up a musical fourth. I check and make sure it works. It plays music in the cart all the way to the check out counter. I don't think too much of it. Then it plays all the way to the next stop which is the gas station. Starting to grate a little, but hey, the car was moving and it's motion detected. It's now playing while I am pumping gas. I add "return annoying ass toy to Target" to the to-do list.

So this is how the day nets out to-do list wise. Laundry doesn't budge. I got two items off the list but added two more due to my own shopping vices (stupid). Not satisfied with this, I add "Update Facebook Status" and "Eat lunch" on the list so I can immediately cross them off and boost my self esteem. I'm considering adding "Deep six to-do list" and being done with the whole torturous process.

Hope everyone out there is having a productive day!

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